Shake it

I’ll go days without it..

Then it will hit me like a ton of bricks.  Fucking depression, loneliness, i always feel foolish for even giving it any notice, but I can’t help it.  I’ll turn to the symbols of my recent stress and bliss and lament over them even though inside ive passed the pain of the actual people /events that were wrapped up in those times. A glutton for punishment.

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I refuse

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Look! I did it all by myself.  Holy hell what a long day. The hours go by so quickly i cant keep track.  At least I’m getting a decent pay check for now.  I miss the ease of Facebook but I will figure out how to make this a viable solution.  Its necessary in this day and age to detach from from the data mining.  I know it seems paranoid. Facebook is appealing, especially to a sick narcissist such as myself, yet the ramifications of what our data is being used for, at least in my mind is terrifying. Although my children have kept me anchored and aware of my necessary direction as a father and a human being,  I am sick and horrified they are living in this age.  Yes,  there were other dark ages, but none with such acute control over the masses as the ones who hold sway over the very small planet we are hurdling through the universe on. With pinpoint precision we will be identified, tagged and herded. I can sacrifice myself, but the thought of my children or other loved ones enduring this nightmare keeps me up at night.